mass-sex-odus

Has begun in earnest.

Watch out London, pretty soon all the coolest people will be on the other side of the world catching rays, picnicing and generally having a whale of a time, while you are drowning in dark months of gloom.

mc cinnabun & the cupcake crew

In honour of Jason's birthday, our work posse constructed some flowing rhymes about a fictional bakery.

In the order of the ensuing email conversation, here are the results.

Walking down the wrong street you might end up dead
But visit my bakery and you'll get some tiger bread
I'm not bragging or boasting but baking and toasting
adding currents to a bun and roasting
let my beats rise....
let my bread rise...
check out my croissants, my bread and my rolls
none of this shit leaves my oven cold
moulding and needing the dough Bruce Grobler
and you haven't even tasted my pan du chocolate

I let my beat flow,
As natural as the olive encrusted sourdough,
I bake in my store,
Everything organic to the core,
My yeast's from the East,
Rises like a beast,
I bake 10 kilo's an hour,
Using shitloads of flour.

i earn money making bread
to support my kid on the one i wed
mis-selling and big bonuses are forgotten
a batch of 13 is a bakers dozen
i swapped corporate sales
for the weighing scales
i make more bread for old ladies
than bill cosby is having babies
the job of a baker is more than just yeast and flour
the men in their suits look at me and scour
i have the world record for making 150 doughnuts in an hour
when i go home, my wife loves how smell.. so i never shower

That's right, baked goods, baked straight out the hood
You can't bake like this-- and no use wishing you could
Our breadmaker is our moneymaker
Every sugary creation has its lucky taker
While you shake your buns, we make 'em hot and crossed
Deliver 'em by the dozen at a profitable cost
Our donuts and our scones are all delicious
Eat them breakfast, lunch and dinner to stay bootylicious
Kelis' milkshake isn't half as tasty
so go on y'all: take a bite out our pastry!

I own a bakery
Because I love to have high tea
I failed my last inspection
But my cakes are perfection
Do not mind the flies
They’re just currants with small eyes
They give protein to my dough
Cus that’s the way I like to flow
But then I baked a clown
And now my bakery is down

Yo Pillsbury..kick it!
My bun
My bun
My bun has expired
Confused sell by for use by
A gastronomic quagmire
Off to the baker man here I go
Needs'ta get me some carb over'lo
pat-a-cake pat-a-cake baker dude
pat me a cake bi@*ch
Sorry didn't mean to sound rude
Feinding the starchy stuff can't you tell
Your wholegrain goodness has got me under a spell

a perfect example of a word that makes no sense when repeated a few times

In banana related news, I have recently been impressed by the addition to my office kitchen of a fruit bowl with a banana hanger. Ingenious, practical and aesthetically pleasing! What more can a lover of the morning banana ask for!